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_POSTEDON 2002-07-14 22:14:22 by jimmyd

jimmyD's Opinion jimmyd _writes "The really neat thing about events like the Free Speech Coalition's 'Night of the Stars' is that you don't need to attend to pretty much know what it's going to be like. That's why I'm writing this report--on Sunday evening while it's taking place--without actually attending.

I know I'm going out on a limb here to predict that the 'Night of the Stars' will be filled with bores and snores, but having been to these functions in previous years, I think it's a pretty safe bet. In fact, no one will be more surprised (and happy) than I if--by tomorrow morning--I read on another site that something exciting happened at the gala event.

It's been my experence that at events like 'Night of the Stars,' a bunch of pornographers come out wearing their Sunday best--make that wearing their Sabbath best--and parade around in front of each other acting as if they are anything but pornographers. That is, acting as if they are fine, upstanding, pillars of the community.

Please don't get me wrong. I don't have a hard-on for pornographers. I am one, after all. And personally, I like a few of them. But when I'm in the mood to speak the plain fucking truth, the plain fucking truth is that pornographers, as a rule, are not fine upstanding pillars of the community. That's not to say there aren't some nice pornographers. There's even some that I suspect fall way short of being without a conscience. But let's face it, this is not a fine upstanding business. It's a tawdry business. And this tawdry business attracts people who flourish at the fringes of society.

I think it's informative to any of my readers who try to understand what makes pornographers tick, to know that I've yet to meet one, i.e., a pornographer, who is not emotionally and/or psychologically dysfunctional in fairly obvious ways---myself included. And that's why I'm predicting all the bores and snores at this years 'Night of the Stars' event: because many of them will go there and act like they're not, uhh, emotionally and/or psychologically dysfunctional.

But also know that pornographers can be a wild, fun bunch to party with! (Except when they're all trying to act and behave in an "aren't-we-a-swell-bunch" way.) So who knows? Maybe on Monday morning I'll be reading reports that make this article a bunch of shit. In fact, there's nothing I'd like more than to read that all the porn girls stripped their clothes off and had wild lesbian sex, which caused the rest of the drunken crowd to riot and engage in a spontaneous orgy, which brought out the both Vice Squad and the Swat Team, who then arrested everyone, and then to read that in incredible acts of generosity and industry comraderie, Steve Hirsch, Russ Hampshire, Larry Flynt, Paul Fishbein, and others, all chipped in, and put up everyone's bail.

We'll see.


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