This has gotta be the worst summer for porn production I've ever seen! And it's not just me whose saying so. Almost everyone I speak with-- crew, talent, agents, suitcase pimps--say the same thing: Worst they've ever seen. (And oh boy are the suitcase pimps screaming bloody murder!)

For some companies it's an official thing. Just last night a source told me that VCA was on official summer production hiatus.

If you don't know what 'hiatus' means, here's a definition: A gap or interruption in space, time, or continuity; a break: “We are likely to be disconcerted by... hiatuses of thought” (Edmund Wilson).

"Hiatuses of thought." Man, was that Edmund guy thinking of the jiz biz or what? I've personally seen more people with more hiatuses of thought in this business than almost anywhere else with the possible exception of the time I spent serving my country in the military, and the significant time I've spent stoned, along with stoned people, but that's material for another jimmyd editorial that I'll probably call 'Hiatuses of Thought." Right now I'm talking about the hiatuses of production work this summer.

Anyway, I mentioned to my source that I'd heard that VCA's Antonio Passolini had shot two features this summer so far, and that Jim Holliday had shot a couple (simultaneously) out in the Mojave desert somewhere. But my guy told me those movies don't count: "Oh, yeah, but that's Tony," he said, not mentioning Holliday, and apparently assuming I knew enough about the inner workings of VCA to understand what his cryptic little comment meant which, of course, I didn't. So for the purpose of this article I guess VCA's hiatus began after Holliday's last movie, since Tony's doesn't count, which is really not important because the really important thing to note is that VCA, and probably some other companies, have made executive decisions to not shoot over the summer.

Some of you might be wondering, "Why is porn production so slow during the summer months, jimmyD?" You might also be asking some insightful follow-up questions to help you understand this seasonal phenomenom-- questions like: "Is Southern California too hot to fuck in during the summer months? Do pornstars go on extended vacations making them unavailable to shoot? Are vice officers in really nasty moods during the summer, and prone to making trouble for production companies? Are directors prefering to lie by their pools, sipping chilled cans of Red Dog while breaking in new bongs? Is the summertime the time for female talent to get new tits, or have fat sucked out of their asses, or have some ass-fat injected into their lips? Do antibiotics not work so well in the summer months?"

Believe it or not, none of the above questions hold any water in terms of explaining the work slow-down. The plain truth of the matter is that during the summer, the normal flow of cash slows down. Yep, that green, paper river that usually flows into the company owner's pockets making them wet with wealth is slowed to a trickle.

Why? Because retail slightly slows, wholesale significantly slows, and because of this, production slows almost to a standstill. And what makes it worse during the summer is that since retail and wholesale (especially wholesale) slows down dramatically, the wholesale companies--let's call them distributors-- that already might be 90 and 120 and 180 or more days overdue on paying for the product they've already bought and re-sold, are now paying out even less while they're buying way less, even if they're really not selling much less!

Consequently, more than a few of these company owners then start thinking, 'Well, not much dough coming in, and I'm certainly not going to let that little fact effect my personal lifestyle, so I guess I'll not shoot anything until things pick up."

Sounds like a reasonable business decision, right?

In some ways, maybe, but in other ways its fucking wrong because it's such an uncaring business decision! And since we all know what caring people the senior echelons of the porn biz are, we also must assume that they're making this decision by mistake, so I guess I'll explain why it's so uncaring so maybe they'll once again be the caring people we all know they truly are.

You see, guys, it's uncaring because what it says is this: It says you don't give a fuck about the welfare of the people whose genitals and orifices you make your living off. You already provide precious little of anything in terms of employment benefits, so why should you care if they starve over the summer? They're all just whores , and the whores will flock back when you're ready to shoot just like they always do, so it's no skin offa your ass! (I guess you figure the whores are like Capistrano's sparrows.) You say, "Let them strip or hook or whatever else they do." You think like that French bitch who once said, "Let them eat cake," before she lost her head.

And let's not forget the crew people who actually make the movies that make some of these guys rich. What does it say about how the porn power brokers care about them? In a word, it says they care about them NOT. They don't freaking care. And that's the plain, honest, pathetic, porn business truth.

But here's an idea: Since production is way down, why don't you shoot anyway and you'll probably find that you can do so for much less!

Yep, people who need work will be more likely to cut a deal and give you a break during these slow summer months. So how about saving some money on your production budgets while letting some starving whores eat? Then it's a win/win situation. You get a break on production during those times when money is tight, and the crew and talent get to pay their rent, make their car payments, eat, and maybe even have a little left over for recreational pursuits! Simple, right? So do the right thing. You'll thank me in the morning.



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