STEP ASIDE, SON. I'M GETTING MY DICK SUCKED! :: Simply Jimmy D :: Breakin' News or Breakin' Balls: It's all the same to me!

jimmyd _writes "Maybe I'm getting old. Maybe I'm just a little bit old-fashioned. Maybe I'm not hip to the shit anymore. I guess I don't know the difference between what's 'bomb,' or 'bomb-ass,' or 'dope.' My bad, I suppose, for not keeping up with all of it. But since there's a lot of stuff going on today that totally bewilders, confuses, and mystifies me, I don't know how I could...keep up, that is.

And then there's stuff that just doesn't seem fucking right.

"There's a signpost up ahead, your next stop, the Twilight Zone." That famous TV line (I think I quoted it right) kind of describes how I feel when I read AVNinsider's very light and fluffy, ain't-this-grand, on-the-set piece about a movie that features a real-life father and son in co-starring sex roles. Hey, come on, what's more natural than that? Fathers and sons should share the best of everything together, including pussy, right? What's more natural than that?

My Dad passed away last year. I had an up and down relationship with him my whole life. My father had a hard time understanding my values and my life-style. We mostly disagreed on almost everything. We disagreed on things as diverse as drugs, the Viet Nam war, and my ex-wife. And I loved him. Because, you see, the one thing we always agreed on--besides his sex life being his, and mine being mine, and never the two should meet--was that family was everything. Without your family you're nothing--zero--lost and alone in a merciless, frightening world. Those in the world without a family to rely on deserved our pity and our empathy.

My father never succeeded with his goal of instilling 'his' kind of work ethic in me. He failed at instilling 'his' version of a social and moral ethic. But when it came to a family ethic, my father was a runaway success. He filled me to the brim with it. That's why I despise and have great comtempt for men and women who choose to turn their backs on their children. Men and women who abuse their children. Men and women who willfully refuse to provide for and care for their children. If you fall into these categories, I say go to hell. You're a piece of shit and deserve less than shit. I hope you die alone with no one to care.

But enough of that. I find this hard to write and harder to stay on track. I apologize for any gaps in the telling of these, my thoughts and opinions, on the subject. So please allow me to try and get back to this father-and-son performing sex scenes together thing.

I'm not saying the father and son in question were in the same sex scene together, but why not? Let's take it to its logical conclusion. We're in the 21st Century aren't we? Why shouldn't we be passing on messages to our audiences like "close family ties include things like watching each other have sex, or joining with each other to have sex?" Am I alone here in thinking there's something not quite right in this? Forget about religion, forget about morality, forget about society, when it comes to family relationships, natural selection naturally precludes having sex within a cumshot of each other!

The article mentions how the Dad had come out here from somewhere or other and was staying with his son and his son's wife--two notable porn stars. Did anyone's imagination wonder if maybe some kinky shit went on back at the marital residence? I'm not saying it did. In fact, I want to believe it did not, and I certainly don't want to offend anyone here by even infering that it did, but the thought did cross my sometimes evil mind. Here we have three people, temporarily sharing one roof. All three are at some level of being legitimate porn stars. Remember...this is the jiz biz, where supposedly, a blowjob is on the same level as a handshake. So why would the fact that one is the father to the guy, and father-in-law to the girl, prevent anyone from thinking some special family closeness might be taking place? It certainly took place on a set--granted, minus the daughter-in-law, in front of a camera and a group of strangers, later to be shown to possibly millions, including a great percentage of those possible millions jerking off while watching. And all this with an AVN reporter in attendance--AVN supposedly being the voice of this business--reporting on the event like it's such a wonderful, unique thing.

Extreme Associates recently claimed to have shot a mother-and-daughter team peforming sex together. Is that okay? What are we saying in our porn flicks? Vice is nice but incest is best? Do I have a problem with that? You betcha!

In the article we're told the father had a hard time getting the pop shot. But eventually, he managed to blow his wad on the girl's face. It was such a jubilant moment, according to AVNinsider, that the son ran up, hugged his Dad, and they high-fived each other. I guess it's just like high-fiving your son who just scored a touchdown in an important football game. What's more natural than that? "Hey Dad! Great pop shot! You really splashed her mug with that shit!"

I read this and tried to imagine my father getting his penis sucked by some pornstar with extra-big, bolt-on tits, and then watching him stroke his penis till he finally managed to blow his seed--the same seed that created me--into the girl's face. Somehow, I couldn't manage the image. Why? Because it was beyond my imagination's ability, I guess. Or maybe because it simply made me want to heave.

I don't know. I just think there's something not right about this. And maybe it's just my lone opinion while working here in the XXX industry But it just doesn't set well with me. We're in the business of fictionalizing amorality, yet I think we still have certain, minimal, moral obligations. But then, maybe we don't. Maybe a pornographer's mandate is to take society's so-called moral conventions and stretch them to wherever they may go--nothing off-limits, nothing taboo, nothing sacred. And if so, maybe I really don't have the true heart of a pornographer.

If there's a price to pay for what we do, I'm glad I'm not stuck with the check on this one.

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WARNING · Extreme Adult Content Discretion Advised