It seems that in my haste to mine the comedic ore that I believed was buried within Carly Milne's recent diatribe on women's porn viewing habits, I completely missed the point.

For my momentary lapse of reason--and attention to detail--I humbly apologize to Ms. Milne.

I have since gone back and re-read Carly's blog on the subject. This time I had a real and genuine porn-epiphany, not a made-up. pretend one like I earlier reported.

Carly makes good sense. It's obvious that this is a subject of great personal importance to her. Carly may indeed be just the woman to lead all women out of the wasteland of stereotyped porn viewing.

In the spirit of the national holiday we all will be celebrating on Monday, January 20, 2003, I took the liberty of re-writing the historic and important words once spoken by a great American, Martin Luther King. I give this plagiarized and bastardized version of Dr. King's words to Carly as a token of esteem for her beliefs.

Carly, this is for you, babe--

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of what is good and just in porn. We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men and women are created sexually equal. I have a dream that one day in every adult video store the daughters of women uncomfortable with their sexuality and the sons of men stroking to gaping assholes, will be able to sit down together in front of one TV screen in brotherhood and sisterhood and enjoy some good smut. I have a dream that one day even the state of Utah, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of sexual inhibition and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice and free porn viewing. I have a dream that all our children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by Mike South's version of their porn viewing habits, but by their willingness and freedom to watch any kind of porn that turns them on. I have a dream today.



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