Porn's most famous news, gossip, and bullshit site, lukeford.com, hasn't been updated in three days.

Word on the street is that it's star reporter, Wanker Wang, has contracted a rare and serious illness. According to reports, Wanker's most recent auditory organ conquest was an ear-whore with a serious ear infection. It's reported that Wang contracted the bacterial infection and his genitals have been seriously effected. There's even a report of an imminent amputation, make that a castration, to save the ailing Wang.

A close associate of Wanker's told me that the intrepid LF.com reporter lies nearly motionless in bed, somewhat delirious, his penis constantly oozing earwax.

We at simplyjimmyd.com wish Wang a speedy recovery and suggest that if he survives, he exercises a bit more caution, i.e., a prophylactic device, the next time he fucks some chic's ear.



"