KENDRA JADE IN D'HOUSE :: Simply Jimmy D :: Breakin' News or Breakin' Balls: It's all the same to me!

jimmyd _writes "I spoke with my good buddy Kendra Jade today. "KJ," as I've always called her, seems to be doing just fine. I phoned at about 2:00 P.M. and, of course, woke her up.

"What? You're still sleeping?" I asked.

"Shutup," she says.

"Some life you have. When's the last time you saw daylight, not counting on TV or in a movie?"

"Shut the fuck up!" she says, her voice raising an octave or two.

"Should I call back later? Like after midnight?" I ask.

"Shut up! I'm awake!" She announces.

And for the rest of the conversation, I'd say she was.

"What have ya been doing?" I asked.

"Nuthin."

Great, I knew this conversation wasn't going to be sensational with her just waking up and all. Now I knew I was going to have to antagonize her a little bit. That's always the trick with KJ. If you want the conversation to be a little exciting, you have to annoy her a bit.

"Someone told me you got fat." I stated, non-chalantly.

"What? Who said that? Who the fuck told you that? I've lost twelve pounds! I look great! I could have gone in an had lypo but I lost the old fashioned way! I worked out and I dieted and I don't know who the fuck told you that but I want to know who."

"I'm a journalist now. I don't give up my sources."

"You tell whoever told you that shit that they're full of shit and I'll kick their ass if I find out who they are!"

Now this is the KJ I truly love. The out of control, going off KJ.

"I was going to have to write that your a boring person now. The once fun, now completely boring Kendra Jade. But now that you've woken up I guess I won't have to."

"Well I am boring," she mewls in that sexy, girlish voice she knows how to drive men crazy with. "I've dedicated my life to being boring. All I do now is dance a couple of times a month, and then stay home and watch movies with my dog. I don't make movies anymore. I don't date anyone. It's just me, my dog, and my DVDs...by the way, do you want to buy any Girl Scout cookies?" she asks out of left field.

"Girl Scout cookies? Kendra Jade's selling Girl Scout cookies? Do you have the outfit and everything?" I ask, now sporting a bit of wood.

"Shut up!" She yells. "My little sis was out here and she was selling them and I wanted her to win the contest for the most cookies sold, so I bought 500 boxes. Now they're all sitting here collecting dust and I can't hardly give them away."

"I'm on a diet," I tell her. "And lypo isn't an option with me. "

"Oh well," she says, "Let me know if you change your mind. So what are you doing?"

"Today, or in general?" I learned a long time ago to clarify KJ's questions.

"Today, I guess," She shrugs. I don't actually see her shrug. But I know this girl well and I know she just shrugged.

"I'm on this radio show later. KSEX radio. I'll be on KSEX.com"

"Oh," she sighs. "I was supposed to do that but I flaked. I mean I really didn't flake, but I was doing this photo shoot with Earl Miller and it went late and I couldn't just leave, so I ended up flaking even though I really didn't want to. I called them though. What are you doing tomorrow? she asks.

"I don't know." I shrug.

"Ok, call me tomorrow around eleven and wake me up and I'll get dressed and come over to your office and we'll hang out and maybe do an interview or whatever."

"Okay," I said. "I'll call you then. C'ya!"

"Bye," she says and hangs up and probably goes back to sleep.

Well, I guess everyone should check back in tomorrow and we'll update you on Kendra Jade and maybe take some new pics and, well, I think it's time for me to go be on that radio show.

Oh yeah, don't forget, it's at www.ksexradio.com at 5:00 P.M. PST.

See you on the radio!

"


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WARNING · Extreme Adult Content Discretion Advised