I love this! Legend Video has signed an eighteen-year-old skateboarder to direct a line of smut videos.

So much, I suppose, for needing any skill, experience, or know-how in making a video.

“Damn! That kid can skateboard!”

“Yup, and because of that, I’ll bet he can shoot smut too.”

According to HardCoreGossip.com, Legend's talent scouts came across Scorpio during 2003's "X Games," hosted in San Francisco, where Scorpio--born and raised on the mean streets of Prague--skated his way into American hearts with his inspired performance.

Legend’s Nelson X is quoted as saying, “We were looking for someone who would appeal to teen girls fresh out of high school: Someone who can relate to them. Understand their dreams and insecurities and knows what the hell Gilmore Girls is about."

jimmyD sez: And where better to find some kid who understands the dreams and insecurities of teen girls fresh out of high school than at a skateboarding competition?

But more importantly, does this mean that Legend is now TARGETING their videos at teen girls fresh out of high school?

Hey Legend! Here’s some free info that might help you have one of them porn epiphanies that are so rare in the jizz biz: Last time I looked, teen girls fresh out of high school weren’t major consumers of porn. I’m basing this on some very informal and unscientific research… and, in fact, I’m somewhat guessing about this; but I think I’m right.

Also according to HardCoreGossip.com, some newbie porn starlet named Antonette, the 18-year-old star of Scorpio's “Teens Goin' Wild #13,” said, "Most guys that shoot porn are old and gross. If I wanted to fuck a decrepit, liver-spotted perv like Dave Cummings, I would still be living in my uncle's basement. Scorpio's cute. And, he loves to trip on balls."

jimmyD sez: Assuming an eighteen-year-old can be corrected on anything cuz, you know, they know it all, let me let me take a stab at correcting Antonette on something she said: Antonette, a more appropriate observation would be that many guys who WATCH porn are old and gross. And most of them would love to have been your uncle... when you were living in his basement.

I also noted that Antonette decided it was more important to identify someone like Dave Cummings—who is one of the nicest decrepit, liver-spotted pervs in the business--as a “decrepit, liver-spotted perv.”

It must have been a purely random choice that Antonette picked on Dave Cummings rather than people like, uhmmm… for the sake of an example... the guys who own Legend Video: Jack and Bruce. Or maybe she forgot about Bruce’s uncle, Jerome Tanner, who shoots a lot of porn for Legend. (Hmm... I wonder if Bruce ever lived in his uncle’s basement?) But oh yeah, some of those guys--who might also be considered decrepit, liver-spotted pervs; at least from an eighteen-year-old's point-of-view--are also responsible for putting some cash in Antonette’s pocket.

Sounds like Antonette’s uncle’s big mistake was not giving the girl a generous allowance while she was living in his basement and--if I'm understanding what Antonette is saying correctly--satisfying his decrepit, liver-spotted, incestuously perverted fantasies.

Hey! Who knows? Had he done so maybe his young basement-toy would still be there.

As for Scorpio-- Good luck, little buddy. If you need any help or information, like where the ON/OFF button is located on the camera, gimme a call. I'm always here to help new pornographers...

Cuz that's the kind'a guy I am.





"